


A Day to Regret

by WordSorbet



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 23:14:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13421667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WordSorbet/pseuds/WordSorbet
Summary: Negan was faithful to his beloved wife Lucille. Until after the strain of the secret she harbored began to cause a rift between them, and a tragic accident forces a reveal of the devastating truth of her condition. This sends Negan on a self sabotaging rampage of bad choices and the ultimate climax of a day he will always regret.





	A Day to Regret

She was beautiful. Lucille had a grace that other women just couldn't compete with. She was stubborn, strong, and sassy all in one package. I woke the morning of the accident with a sting of resentment. The last week had been punctuated with various arguments and not the typical type. Something was going on with my wife and she wasn't opening up to me. Little things would flare up into a full blown, knock down, drag out fights. It wasn't like her to be so nit-picky and edgy. 

As I prepared myself to head to the school for work, she had been at the kitchen table picking at what was a minimal excuse for a breakfast at best. I sat down across from her with a mournful look plastered to my features. "Baby, can we talk?" My voice earnestly inquiring to crack her open to let me know what was going on with her that she wasn't telling me. She sighed in annoyance as her fork fell to the table in some sort of rebellious manner. "Negan, just go to work.. okay? It's not important." My lip now twitching in a concoction of concern, fear and anger as my voice now firmly conveyed that I was insistent on her giving me answers. "We need to address whatever it is you aren't telling me!" 

Her snap at me caused my anger to flare as she responded with a slam to the table. "JUST GO TO WORK! I DON'T WANT TO DISCUSS IT!" I left in a huffed mess and slammed the door breaking the window in the same motion. I felt helpless as I left with the screech of my tires against the pavement. What I wouldn't expect was the phone call that would change my life forever. It was about lunch time when I was called to the office. As the secretary handed me the phone with a melancholy look, my heart began to beat that much faster. My hand trembled as I held the receiver up to my ear. "This is the hospital.. your wife, Lucille.. she's been in a car accident. She is currently in stable condition, but I think it would be advised that you come here to speak to the doctor sir." I felt like I needed to be pinched. This was some nightmare right? I had dozed off in my office during lunch and I am just having a terrible nightmare. "Yes.. yes of course, I will be right down!...Thank you." I slowly hung up the phone as my boss stepped out. She could see the worry in my eyes as they welled up. "Go .. I will get a sub for your classes." I nodded without words and headed straight to the hospital. 

As I drove I felt numb, and wished this was all just a vivid dream I would awaken from at any second. I took a deep quivering breath as I gathered myself to head inside and inquire where my wife was located and to speak to her doctor. Oddly, they didn't send me directly to her, they had me go to the doctor's office right away. I protested, but with no luck. As per usual it was the 'hurry up and wait' M.O. that struck as I found myself waiting anxiously before the damn doctor FINALLY decided to show up. "Good evening, I am Dr. Carson... I am your wife's doctor in the hospital's cancer unit." I couldn't help but give him a double take as I responded with doubt laced in my voice. "I think you have the wrong person. My wife was in an automobile accident, she doesn't have cancer." He waited for me to finish as he then nodded and continued. "She hasn't spoken to you about it yet. I'm afraid your wife is in the throws of the final stages of a very advanced and progressive form of brain cancer." He paused and allowed for it to fully sink in. My face must have gone pale and I felt my heart beat twice as fast as the news slowly processed. 

This had been her secret, and she hadn't wanted me to worry. While I was struck with empathy, and a vague form of anger, I felt the searing heat of tears as they carved their way down my face. "What are you saying? My wife is dying?" He then began to explain that the crash had escalated the advancement of her countdown to death. It was as if someone had ripped out my fucking heart and stuck it on a spike for all to see as I lay bleeding out. My anger for her silence and not trusting me with such information only grew and I wound up storming out of Dr. Carson's office. 

It was the first time I felt impulsive and irrational. It was as though the universe collided and rallied against me. I would show those mother fuckers this wasn't the end of me. I would drown myself and numb myself from this and overcome! I drank... I recall the bar, the patrons as the night drew on. A woman, clad in some piss poor excuse of a dress who would pick me up in my sad vulnerable state. In my weakness, I would follow the path of regret and I would fuck this woman. I would thrust my hatred in and out of her as we tangled in a battle of angry sex. It was far from gratifying, it would only cause my regret to grow that much more. In a haze I lay there, stinking of booze and sleaze, I knew I would need to face my Lucille in the morning. I would have to look her in the eye and face it all. What have I done? What will I do? I know I have to find my balls and grab myself by them and drag my ass out of this mental and caustic rut. Would I ever be the same again?


End file.
